In Love With My Best Friend

I think it's time I finally admit it. I'm in love with my best friend. I'm always thinking about him when I'm not with him, I'm constantly checking his location to see what he's up to, and I can't help but daydream about what his lips must feel like. It's not that he's unattractive, but I hadn't seen him in this kind of light until recently after he cut his hair. Ever since then, every time I look over at him there's just something about him that is so hot to me. The worst part though is that I know he'll never feel the same way.

We originally met because we were in the same fraternity together. He ended up being my big. I guess there was something about me he just really liked, and ever since then we've gotten really close. It's been a few years now and while there's been plenty of jokes made about him being gay or the two of us being attached at the hip, but he's been denying it for long enough now that I can't help but feel that if it was going to happen it would've already happened by now.

The worst part is that most of the time that I've known him he's been tragically single, but now he has a girlfriend. It's weird though because I don't even think he likes her very much. He never talks about her, and he even admitted that he would've broken up with her already if it weren't for them having a class together.

I genuinely don't know what to do. He's all I can ever think about, and wanting him this badly hurts so much. I feel like the only answer is for me to get some distance from him and hope one of us comes to our senses, but I don't want to give up if there really could be something between us, and I don't want to potentially lose my friend.